d12 what the fuck kind of rejects did we run into this time
- Foraging crew (3 officers, 3d10 semi-intelligent zombies) of Karrnathi Unterwasserboot Todmansliebe, Capt. Dallmeyer commanding. Experimental transplanar strike craft, hopeless navigational issues, no clue the War is over, amiable disposition and high morale. Crewed to capacity, low on fuel crystals and other supplies. Prone to ask "vich vey zo Sharn, bitte?"
- Toll post of Giants on the great river, with watch towers and a huge net across the stream. Allied with local mer/crab/mollusk-men or other assorted Deep One-knockoffs. Embarrassing case of cross-species STD doing the rounds.
- Deeply paranoid party of Shadowbinder Drow on an infiltrition in the soft, weak overworld. Lost in the jungle and lost even more in their political officer's daily propaganda. Indoctrinated to believe that overworlders will sell their souls, secrets, riches and precious protein for baubles, and will fall for the most pathetic schemes. Carry nothing that isn't trapped, poisoned, honed or enchanted to kill. Slave carries their trading supplies of baubles - returning daggers, decoy homunculi, everhungry cloaks, boots of invisible tracks (will hide tracks but leave marks that glow in darkvision).
- Serpent Folk slavers (1d6, and 2d4 drugged humanoid guards) returning to market with 3d6 new acquisitions (roll on table of People/sentients). At least one undercover revolutionary in the group - 1d6: 1-3 number of slave revolutionaries; 4 guard; 5 guard and slave; 6 Serpent Folk bleeding heart mistaking suicide vengeance squad of 3 slaves for revolutionary cadre that will help build a just new society where all are free.
- Giant ants (1 weary overseer, 1d3+1 soldiers, 2d4 workers) carefully herding oozes and fungi to clear a death trap bonanza Drow burial vault which Princess First of Tender Ministrations has declared the site of her future colony. Going is slow and frustrating, with suspicions of the oozes intentionally leaving some traps intact. Overseer would love for a team of experts do a hands-on inspection of the project. Will promise first dibs on any annoying gold or arcana cluttering the chambers. Will need to contend with oozes having reached critical mass and bootstrapping their hive mind into full-Shoggoth rebellion.
- Happier than a pig in mud-explorers Prof. Livingstone and Prof. Stanley from Arcanix University. Wandering the jungle in blissful ignorance of their treacherous guides, the wild narcotic properties of the local "pipe weed" and the horrific curses on their archeological finds. Curiously lucky in avoiding the many accidents that strike their companions instead of them. Picture two clueless gentleman-explorers gallivanting around the jungle going "I say, what a pretty view, more tea?" while their cartoon villain guides are picked off by flesheating spider horrors.
- Cyclops archaeologist ultra-carefully excavating ancient Giant fortress, keeps berating innocent Hill Giant servants for tearing down delicate structures at night. Sleepwalks, drawn to buried mindcrystal that houses survivor of the big extraplanar invasion from the nightmare realm 40k years ago.
- Swamp of super relaxed, doped out tree frog-people enjoying the warm waters. Attended by motley crew of 1d6 wildly different servants (roll randomly for people, animals, vermin) that have become enchanted and docile after exposure to the drug-soaked swamp water. Use as nymphs but with more slime.
- Dream merchant willing to provide ancient, weird or just plain otherplanar gear for minor deliveries and fetch quests, clearing of vermin from a local glade, etc.. Actually a bunch of trained phase spiders that deliver shiny crap on behalf of a psychic tree monster that's trying to lure sentient food to its lair.
Stranded House Orien teleporter on a deep secret mission to treat with a Rakshasa demon. Have agreed to both teleport into and meet a an easily described hidden valley. Valley functions as ancient Giant honey pot for invading Quori (nightmare) spirits - you can teleport in, but then a magic circle goes up until the local overseer can check you out. Human and demon very suspicious of each other, playing polite shadow games to find out each other's real, true, actual motivation. Last Giant overseer died 40k years ago protecting hidden vault of promising Giant children in deep stasis. All animals in valley carry soul fragments of stark raving mad nightmare spirits. Have started to eat each other to concentrate spiritual power, take over biped invaders and open dimensional lock.Overburdened crap.
Take two: two mages + entourage have teleported to this beautiful valley to discuss illegal trade or treasonous activity. Local shaman is troubled by dreams that indicate one of the visitors is a demon in disguise.
- Hapless troupe of actors from Sharn have decided to travel the jungle for inspiration with ever-diminishing band of stage hands. So far, have picked up cursed golden idols, gems that are whispering demon souls, the skull of a ravening ancient vampire, sacred totems of the local filed teeth Drow, two changeling impersonators, and well hidden and increasingly bemused locals following them with bets on how much longer they'll last.
- Burlesque smugglers. (I have no idea. My wife suggested this one while watching Mel Brooks' The Producers.)
- BONUS ENCOUNTER FOR WHEN YOU'RE STUMPED BY ANOTHER ENTRY: group of young industrial espionage gnomes hunting for the next scientific breakthrough after elemental binding, necromancy or Warforged. (Could still be burlesque, offers my wife.)
- SUPER EXTRA BONUS ENCOUNTER: Giant hermit preaching wisdom to bunch of deeply conflicted Drow, who are torn between unending racial hatred for anything over 6 feet tall and the fact that the hermit is a werescorpion, which must surely be a sign from their scorpion god Vulkoor. Hermit's poisonous sting conveys scorpianthropy and is also 90% deadly. Drow understandably less than enthousiastic about those odds, but will gladly try to rope interlopers into transfering holy werescorpionishness unto less troublesome vessel, leaving the group free to kill off the hermit without offending Vulkoor.